Today I need to write from my heart. So please bear with me as this isn’t about homesteading so much as my need to put my feelings down before they bubble over.
Today I am shocked and saddened by the way life changes in a second. A 4H family I knew in Colorado was involved in a terrible car accident. Two lives were lost, one child is barely hanging on and another has been forever changed. My heart is breaking for them. I just cannot fathom what they are going through.
Today I feel helpless. What can I do to help 800 miles away? What could I really do if I were right there?
Today I am reminded that life isn’t about bills and deadlines and who said what about whom. It is about smiling, laughing, hugging and just being.
Today I am happy to have a cold and sore throat. I will take my medicine with a smile. If this is only health problem my family is dealing with, I am lucky.
Today I will gladly clean up after my children for the 8,000th time. I am fortunate that this isn’t the last time I pick up a plastic dinosaur, rewash a pair of clean jeans someone forgot to put away, scrub a smoothie cup someone didn’t rinse out or wipe a huge glob of toothpaste off the bathroom sink. I will do these things over and over and try to remember that not having to do them would be far more painful.
Today I will weed the overgrown raspberry patch with a smile on my face. I will be happy for the money I had to buy it, the hands I have to work it and the food that it will provide to nourish us.
Today I will call my children halfway across the country just to hear their voices. They will only talk for a second because they will be far too busy playing. I won’t feel left out because I will remember that these summer vacations at their grandparent’s house won’t last forever. And beside, talking to them for just a minute or two, knowing they will be coming home soon, those things are truly gifts.
Today my husband and I will discuss a thousand boring details. What do we do about the raccoons, what time is he getting off work, what should we have for supper. And each time I hear his voice, I will smile. I will try to remember that the small things, the minor irritations, don’t really matter in the grand scheme. What matters is that he is by my side, holding my hand day in, day out, no matter what.
Today I will think about what matters most in this life: my family, my friends. Love, happiness, laughter, kindness. Sunny days and gentle rains. Flowers and snowball fights. Hard work and lazy breaks in the shade. Loud, crazy times and moments of silent reflection. Snuggling with my baby, reading aloud to my son, braiding my daughter’s hair, kissing my husband goodnight.
Tomorrow I will try to remember all I am thinking about today.